There were plenty of things to worry about in 2010. Managing work and (school) work. Planning a wedding. Finding time to spend with my family and Jay. And then news came my Boss is due for maternity leave from June to early August. I guess that period of time must have been the most stressful period for me, having to deal with final semester, (October) wedding and reports/ad-hoc duties at work. I really wonder how I made it through that period. Definitely some brains cells must have died in the process.
Now that I've graduated and became a Mrs., somehow the worrying don't seem to stop. Actually, I worry about other matters. Like how can I go for cervical cancer vaccination when I am pressured to have a child, my Dad's health (always thinking about it), my Mum's mood swings which screams "menopause has arrived!", housing matters, financial matters (saving for "emergency fund"). At this point the most worrying seems to be financial matters.
I don't think and I hope we are/will be poor in the sense to make ends meets. I feel we can, it's just that there is not much savings and somehow there's an alarm going off in my head how should I manage my money blah blah blah. Of course I am saving already and trying *somewhat* hard not to spend it all away, but seeing your friends having it their way do doesn't bring much of a moral booster?
For example my sister in law. Her fiance and her recently got a car, bought the DBSS apartment at Simei and getting married next year and they seem to be taking it really easy. Looking back at how Jay and I scrambled to save up for a wedding in 8 months seem to be really sad/funny. I don't know. Maybe it's quarter-Life Jasmine talking here. And my secondary school classmate who is also blissfully married to her husband who also has a car, bought their resale flat and both having stable careers.
With all respect I am not talking about materialistic needs/desires here. I just wonder how they make it because I want to be like that. To have good financial sense and to be able to manage my money properly so that I have money when I need it. I want to take my Mum on a well deserved holiday to Hokkaido like she always wanted, with plenty of money for her to spend. To build railings etc at home for my Dad and provide him with better medical needs. I want have a home of our own with Jay, and have child so that my Dad can see his grandson/daughter.
Or maybe I am just thinking too much.
Permalink \ j as m i n e _ left you a note at 4:59:00 pm